Animals can help reduce the vulnerability children feel when they’re working at different types of behaviors or emotional challenges. Whether you’ve to talk to your child about “all the missing cookies” or a more dangerous matter, the presence of a pet can continue way toward reducing his or her discomfort and self-consciousness. Being able to hug a dog or pet a cat while dealing with some tough issues helps to limit the feeling of “being on the spot.” The warmness of an animal’s body, the softness of its coat – the very fact that it’s a animate thing – provides an opportunity for emotional relief and connection.

Many pet owners say they enjoy the categoric love an animal provides. What is perhaps more important is the opportunity a pet provides to express love.

I’m not suggesting that you immediately rush away and buy a pet if your child is dealing with behavioural or emotional challenges. But if your family would like a pet and can make the commitment to provide it with a good, safe home; it’s worth considering. Your child may enjoy researching different animals and planning for its care.

Many parents have learned that pets are an excellent way to build empathy as well. Taking care of the family pet, or a stint “dog-watching” or “cat- sitting” for a neighbor might be a child’s first job. Children sense that animate thing* require greater care on their part and usually rally to meet expectations when they’ve been given a sense of responsibility for an animal: picking its name, selecting its collar, choosing special pet snacks or toys at the food market. Animals serve both as real companions and as potent symbols that wind their ways deeply into children’s minds, providing a health opportunity for emotional projection. Why else would animals turn up so frequently in children’s art and stories?

Some studies have even shown that the presence of a dog while learning bullfighter play the piano helps speed up those processes. This adds up to me. So much of what children struggle with during learning is a lack of fluency brought out by their own self-consciousness. Anxiousness inhibits the neural connections that make learning easier. Isn’t it harder for all of us to learn something whenever we’re worried about doing it well enough? The presence of an animal reduces that self-consciousness and supports the capabilities of a more at ease mind.

In her challenging book, Why the Wild Things Are, psychologist Gail Nelson writes articulately about animals in the lives of children. She cites studies demonstrating that when animals are present in the schoolrooms of young children, it helps them gain control of the emotional swings that are part and parcel of babyhood. Dr. Nelson also notes that by third grade, animals are much less in attendance – probably for the same logistical reasons it’s hard to bring animals into traditional therapy sessions.

In my own clinical office, I’ve fish which, while not being as physically accessible as a cat, dog, or guinea pig, are still a source of projection for the children I work with. “Can you see Mr. Little?,” I might ask. “Does he feel shy like you do sometimes?” “How do you like my shark? He thinks he’s so tough he doesn’t have to listen to anyone –does he remind you of anybody?”

In so many ways, animals connect children to a reality larger than themselves. A child who cannot bear to share with his brother or make a concession to please his sister may faithfully walk the dog or forgive a chewed-up baseball mitt—learning to nurture and empathize in the process. The companionship and devotion typically provided by the family pet can be of great consolation in a hectic household, now and again when a child is “in the doghouse,” dealing with a tough transition, or feeling sad or lonely.

Pets of all kinds can truly be a “family’s best friend.”